In an earlier post, I talked about our big dog Gracie pooping blood. Two weeks went by and she seemed to be alright, until this past week.
On Wednesday, we noticed that Gracie was really lethargic and seemed to be breathing heavily even though she was just resting. The Hubby decided to stay home and take her to the vet. They did x-rays and discovered that her heart was enlarged. They wanted us to take her to Gulf Coast Veterinary Specialists. I met the Hubby at the vet and we took Gracie down there. Dr. Heald discovered that her heart was beating about 3 times the normal speed. He was very attentive and sexplained it to us for about a half hour. He drew a diagram of the heart and showed us that Gracie’s upper chambers were not working with her lower chambers and because it was beating so fast, there wasn’t enough time for the heart to fill with blood. So instead of a smooth flow of blood, it was going off in spurts. He described her heart as “quivering” instead of “beating.” He said they needed to keep her overnight and try different medications to slow her heart down. We left our Gracie there, knowing she was in the best possible care. The doctor called throughout the night to give us updates. They also discovered what could be tumors in her kidney and liver. He said it was a much more serious situation – the heart was just the tip of the iceberg. We prayed that Gracie would make it through the night so that we could see her at least one more time.
On Thursday, we went back up to the hospital. We spent time with her, but that got her too excited and they were still having trouble slowing her heart down. All the regular medications weren’t working and they were running out of options. Since we couldn’t be with Gracie, we stayed on that side of town and wandered around aimlessly. At about 1 pm, we got a call from Dr. Heald tellign us that the medicines weren’t working.
We went back to the vet and got to visit with her again. The doctor got on the floor with us as we pet Gracie. We discussed the quality of life and talked about what an amazing pet Gracie was. The doctor knew and said that the entire staff was absolutely in love with her. If we treated the lymphoma (it was definitely tumors on her kidney and liver and they most likely made microscopic deposits in the heart), we would do more damage to an already damaged heart. If we took her home to live out her days there, she wouldn’t have lasted long since Gracie would get excited even if a fly flew by. We couldn’t put her through any more trials to slow her heart down. It wasn’t fair to Gracie and nothing was working. We made the painful decision to let her go. We had a lot of time with her before they did it and Gracie was showered with thanks and love and hugs and kisses. She gave us kisses and looked in our eyes as if she understood what was happening. Dr. Heald came back and gave her the overdose of barbiturates. Even as she was passing, she was still showering the Hubby with kisses as he held her. Needless to say, we are devastated.
Our house does not feel like a home anymore without Gracie there, but every day, it gets a little easier to bare. We see her everywhere – in the scratched walls, the half-chewed corner of the entertainment center, the hair that has gathered on the stairs, the blinds that are torn up because she wanted to see when we came home, and in the couch where we used to cuddle. We realized when we came home that she was our shadow. I find myself looking down so I don’t step on her whenever I’m in the kitchen. Life will never be the same. She will always be remembered and treasured. Anyone who knew Gracie knew that she had so much love to give (sometimes too much). It was not shocking her heart was too big. She was a great mommy to the Bugaboo – very protective and playful. It’s a shame because Bugaboo was just starting to really play with the dogs and she and Gracie would have so much fun. We have another dog Bobo and he’s starting to feel it. We’re trying to give him a lot of attention and love. On Saturday night, he started getting a little needy and he’s been leaving “presents” around the house. I’m going to talk to the vet today about getting another dog – how long do we wait for Bobo’s sake? He’d gotten used to having a companion. I’ll let you know what they say. It tears me up because Bobo knew Gracie better than anybody.
We picked out a beautiful marker for her that will have her picture on it. We’ll put that in our backyard. One of the selling points of the house was that backyard for Gracie. It was so big and we pictured her running and playing all over it, only to find out that she preferred to be in the house with us. We’re having her cremated and will have her ashes in an appropriate urn we found that will be kept on the piano – where she would always listen to us play.
We lost a great pet, but now God has one of his angels back. If not all dogs go to Heaven, Gracie definitely made it through, scratching at the pearly gates and making St. Peter shout, “Get out the paint!”
Good times... 